What I do when I want to give up
I would like to share something vulnerable with you.
I’ve been leading programs and trainings for over 12 years now and I rarely have large groups. My groups tend to remain intimate. I’ve learned that my work calls to a specific type of woman – it’s not for everyone. Most people don’t see nuance and subtleties, which is why this work naturally attracts the small percentage who do.
Launching a program means working hard to get lots of good content out there. Placing ads. Taking phone calls. Putting these programs, and let’s be real, myself, out into the world with the understanding that the work won’t call to most women.
People ask me: “How do you keep doing it? How do you keep putting yourself out there?”
Sometimes I ask myself the same question. Yes, I do sometimes feel like giving up. When it gets really hard and tough and lonely. When doubt creeps in about who wants what I have to offer.
Today was one of those days.
And today I did what I always do when I feel this way – I turned inward.
I put on a somatic practice I had recorded months ago and settled into my chair. At first, I just wanted a solution. I wanted to skip the process and get to the answer of what was troubling me.
But I chose curiosity instead.
When I invited my body to show me what was happening, I became aware of something in me that felt small. Closed in on itself. And then I sensed it – this sagging satchel stretching from my stomach to my back, overflowing with frustration. The cloth was sagging under the weight of everything in it.
I did what I teach: I stayed with it. No agenda. Not trying to fix it or understand it or talk myself out of it.
Just being present with this overflowing frustration.
As I stayed there – for several minutes – something began to shift. A need for spreading emerged. A need for opening. Like spreading my wings. And when I invited Hashem’s shefa, His readiness to give me exactly what I needed…
The sagging satchel transformed into something structured. Formed. A container that could hold everything I was carrying.
And from that place, energy came. Strength. The knowing that I can keep going – even with the frustration, even with the disappointments, even with not knowing how many women will join this round of B’Etzem.
This is what I offer you.
This training isn’t just about techniques, but the capacity to be with what you don’t even yet know is there under the surface: the frustration, uncertainty, and overwhelm until something new can emerge.
The simple-yet-complex skills of staying with what’s uncomfortable until transformation becomes possible. This is the power of B’Etzem.
6 days left. Registration closes this Sunday at 4pm EST so I can spend Sunday evening preparing our sacred container.
If you’re ready to learn how to stay with what is until transformation emerges, this is your invitation to join the small group that’s forming.
Prefer to speak with me first? I’d love that! Send me an email and we’ll find a time to talk.
What would shift if you could turn your stuck places into sources of energy?
With trust in the process,
Rena
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