When clients can’t access what they think they should feel (and why that’s actually perfect information)
I want to share something that illustrates a common dynamic many of us encounter in our practices.
Sometimes clients come feeling frustrated because they know they’re “supposed to” feel grateful for something in their life, but they just… can’t access it.
They think something’s wrong with them. They’re trying to force gratitude, trying to think their way into the feeling, but it’s not working.
Guess what? The body doesn’t care what we’re “supposed to” feel. The body only knows what’s actually true in this moment.
Maybe there’s grief that needs to be felt first. Maybe there’s anger that’s been pushed down. Maybe there’s exhaustion that’s been ignored.
As practitioners, this gives us invaluable information about where to meet our clients.
Instead of colluding with their story about what they should be feeling, we can get curious about what IS actually present – even if it’s not what they expected or wanted.
The body has its own timeline, its own wisdom, its own order of operations.
When we try to bypass what’s actually here to get to what we think should be here, we create more tension, more disconnection.
But when we meet clients exactly where their nervous system is, honoring what’s actually present rather than what “should” be present, that’s when things start to shift naturally.
Learning to track what’s actually alive in your client’s system – rather than what the story says should be there – is a core skill we develop in B’Etzem.
B’Etzem Level 1 begins in 13 days. Ready to develop this capacity to meet clients in their authentic experience rather than their “should” experience?
Prefer to speak with me first? I’d love that! Send me an email and we’ll find a time to talk.
What do you notice when you set aside what your clients think they should be feeling and get curious about what’s actually present?
With trust in your process,
Rena
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