369 – Why Earth Types Hold On (And How to Let Go)

In this episode, I sit down with my husband, Rabbi Yonasan Reiser, to explore four personality elements—fire, air, water, and earth—focusing on the complexity of Earth types: deep thinkers and feelers who often hold onto experiences long after others have moved on .

I explain why Focusing is uniquely effective for Earth types. Unlike rigid modalities, Focusing is client-led; when a therapist misses the mark, the Earth type’s deep internal attunement allows them to immediately identify the mismatch and correct it, creating a powerful sense of being understood .

We conclude by discussing the “felt shift,” what happens in the nervous system when words finally match our pre-verbal sense, and the Earth identity paradox, where non-Earth types often claim the label while many Earth types struggle to recognize themselves.

If this episode resonated with you, I recommend Get Along With Everyone: Especially Those You Find Most Challenging by Rabbi Shimon Gruen. This is the book I referenced when talking about the four element types — it’s the framework that shaped how I think about fire, air, water, and earth, and why certain people seem so different from everyone around them. If you’re a practitioner and you’re starting to see your clients through this lens, or if you recognized yourself as an Earth and want to understand that more deeply, this is where to go next. Order a copy here — this is an affiliate link which doesn’t cost you anything extra and helps support my work.
https://www.amazon.com/Get-Along-Everyone-Especially-Challenging/dp/1981221999?tag=towardsahealt-20